Chapter 2 ( Hitting my knees )

Ok, so I left you with the most important phone call of my life. Let's pick up there.

I was awake on the couch reading a Women's World magazine, it was almost 11:00 p.m. on a Thursday night. I got a phone call. I answered it. Long story short, it turns out that a baby was being placed for adoption. I hung up the phone and made a few more calls. A young mother had given birth earlier that day and would be deciding between several families who would raise her child in a private adoption.  I called my mother, sister, a few close friends, and my pastor. I woke my husband up and I filled him in. I prayed all night.

I knew we would hear the next day about the birth mother's choice. I decided to go on to work. I had learned from years of fertility treatments and false hopes that I had better prepare for the worst. All morning telling myself when I got the call that another family had been chosen, I would try to remember that they knew the pain that we knew. I prepared to try and celebrate for them, and not be hurt that it wasn't us this time.

Around 10:00 on Friday morning, I recieved a text message telling me to come and meet my daughter. In that moment the entire world faded away. I read the words, but it took a few seconds to comprehend them. I threw my phone and dropped to my knees in front of my co-workers. I began to cry out to God in praise. I thanked him over and over. One of my sweet co-workers joined me on her knees and the other ran and got her camera. They told me that I kept saying, " Thank you God, Thank you God, I never thought I would live to see this day!" I finally was able to stand. I got in touch with my husband and I headed to meet this wonderful gift.

When I arrived at the hopital where my daughter was, I found my husband already there. He is a rough, tough hunter/golfer man's man type of husband, but he was sitting teary eyed in his car waiting for me. We met the birth parents of our daughter for a few brief moments. We don't know their names and they don't know ours. Those didn't seem to be important details. We discussed a few things and we answered questions about the future. The very few details I know about the birth mother will remain private until I share them one day with my daughter. We decided to go in and see our baby all together. They made the decision that their last time to see her would be our first.  I had tried to hold back the tears, but the moment I entered the room and saw that tiny, precious baby.......I lost it. I could not hold back my tears. I grabbed the hand of the girl that I will always be in debt to for the rest of my life. I didn't know how to thank her in that moment for what she had given me. I had come to believe that I would never know a mother's love. I had decided that God had not chosen me to be a mom, but all that changed that very second. I held the birth mother's hand, and I thanked her. I told her I would pray for her everyday for the rest of my life.

In a world where adoption is often not the easiest choice to make, she loved my daughter enough to give her to a family that she knew could provide for that sweet baby. I have thought about that birth mother every day. She gave us a gift that had only been a dream.
We hugged and with tears in both of our eyes we parted ways. She told me that she was as sure of this as she had been anything in her life, that this wonderful baby was meant for me and not her.

We then played the waiting game for the legal aspect of the adoption to play out over the next 48 hours. I was a nervous mess, but I knew that God's hand was way too evident for something to go wrong.

Sunday morning at 11:00 I found out that Miss Danielle "Dani" Marie Martin was officially ours. My heart has not come out of the clouds yet. We are so in love with this amazing, tiny girl!!!
God is so good, and we have the proof sleeping at this very moment right before our eyes!!!
More to come very soon!